The Neighborhood Monster

Ms. Amethyst had an encounter with our local monster this morning — the monster buck of whom I posted that fuzzy photo a while back, that is. Being a night owl I was still sleeping so I’m just a tiny bit envious.

She says that she was in the garage when she saw another buck, a four pointer, cross the driveway between the garage and the front of our truck (AKA “Doat”), so she quietly crept closer to the garage door to get a better look (through the windowed panels in the door). She watched the deer walk toward the south, then when she turned to her right to look straight out through the window she was face to face with the monster buck, just two feet away, who was looking in at her. She said hello to him, and he nodded his head like the macho stud muffin that he is and then after observing her for a time sauntered off following his buddy. She said that being so close to him she was able to get an accurate count and he’s a six pointer (counted Western style) and the tops of his antlers are well above the top of her head.

Life is good when the monster in the neighborhood is a deer.


8 thoughts on “The Neighborhood Monster

    1. happierheathen Post author

      It’s fun at times, and a real pain in the ass at other times. It takes a seven foot fence to keep the deer out of the veggie garden and anything that’s not inside a tall fence is fair game to them. We’re coming up on hungry bear season, which means being sure that the doors are closed at night so they don’t come in to raid the pantry — they’re already snooping around the edges of town and one had to be darted and relocated not long ago from right near where Amethyst works. That makes her nervous, as she’s the first one to arrive well before sunrise.

      But when it’s not a pain in the ass it’s nice. 🙂

    1. happierheathen Post author

      It would be illegal to trade in wild game animals. 😀 Besides, I’m not a big fan of the possum on a half shell and don’t get along with raccoons at all. The last one I met was being an aggressive little bitch so I hurled a shovel at her. Also a lawn chair, a big rock, a digging fork, and some firewood. Then Amethyst pointed out that one of her kits was in a tree we’d just passed and we’d got between momma and kit so I knew why she was being a little bitch — but I just didn’t have it in me to feel bad about hurling things at her. We were just walking along minding our business until she started growling and advancing on us, and we were already well past her baby when she started, so it was her own doing. 😀

  1. theinfiniterally

    Maybe the bears and deer will keep each other occupied. I’m ashamed to admit I’d be tempted to get a hunting license with healthy grass-fed meet wandering so close to the house. Of course, you’d have to garrote it or something and it might be trouble to harvest a six-point buck by hand. Maybe better to just keep watching. 😀

    Bear time, huh? I remember that we both commented once upon the extinct state of the Colorado grizzly. I was excited to read recently that some people still claim to occasionally spot one. There was some thought, I don’t know how informed, that the state would cover up any such remnant population for fear of restrictive endangered species regulations. I suppose the odds are pretty low, but I can’t help wondering what you think of the possibility.

    1. happierheathen Post author

      It’s illegal to hunt in town, which is why the critters hide out in town during hunting season. The hot ticket for hunting around here is to know the right people so you can get onto the best of the best private land.

      There aren’t any Grizz in Colorado, but there are ignorant fucking city people who see brown fur on a bear and proclaim it to be a Grizzly for no reason other than it being a color other than black.


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