April Has Sucked

The way the month of April has been for me…


It started out okay, then the Heartbleed bug was announced on the 7th. I worked my fanny off on that, then BAM! My internet connection turned flaky on the 10th. Not seriously flaky, but enough that I was alerted to it a few times. By the 12th it was punking out almost once an hour. On the 15th it died completely so I called CenturyLink and was informed that there was a problem at the central office — I’m guessing the DSLAM (Digital Subscriber Line Access Multiplexer) was gone wonky. A few hours later I received a text message telling me it was fixed. But then over the next several days it was clear that my internet connection was NOT fixed. But do you see how the peaks there get progressively lower? It seemed a good sign that somebody or something somewhere was somehow doing something that might make that red line go away again.

Then the sumbitch went exponential on me.

As that red line has gone, so has my frustration level. And the screwy part is that the red line wasn’t all that big a part of my frustration — it was just a minor magnifier. Up until last night (when the trend ended) I figured it for CenturyLink’s problem, and CenturyLink agreed with me. I am not the only local customer who’s been complaining about degraded performance since the unspecified central office failure. Makes me wonder if the DSLAM actually did slam some modems.

I’ve been reduced to using one of the shitty modems that CenturyLink provides until I get around to buying more spares. I hate that. The bastards have a back door on their DSL modems that I cannot turn off. I can login on the thing via telnet and turn off their web activity logs, have even automated it so that it gets done by my computer without my fingers being involved, but that back door is there to stay.

Since that red line went back to zero my development work has been going swimmingly, too. Go figure. And just to drive home the point that totally disconnected events can at times appear to be causally connected, I received an email message from some random guy on the internet who has need not only of a programmer just like me, but also of a system administrator for “several Ubuntu servers and two Centos servers”, including monitoring and backups which means monthly ding. 🙂 I ended up leaving him a voice mail message, but hope to talk to him tomorrow and maybe get his new monthly contract in place for the first of May.

In other news, April has been the month in which the last two reliably good dispensers of food I didn’t cook myself became not so good. First it was the meat market/sandwich joint which until recently was justified in charging six bucks a pop for burgers, and which now seems not worth stopping at. Their meats are still the best in town but their burgers are teh suck. Then my pal Johnny who runs the Chinese takeout joint forgot how to cook. First his existing menu developed increasing suck factor, then he introduced some new menu items… his new teriyaki beef bowl left me with an unpleasant lump in my gut for the next 28 hours. To make it even worse, Johnny doesn’t know jack about Japanese food — it was not teriyaki. Teriyaki sauce is very easy to make, with just three ingredients. He was missing two of them and there’s no telling what that other shit in there was. It was like some kind of sad barbecue sauce made by an amateur who doesn’t know what goes into barbecue sauce. We haven’t gone back since. We tried the meat market/sandwich joint again today and it sucks even worse than it did a few weeks ago.

It looks like I’m going to have to be more careful about setting aside time to cook even when I don’t want to, which is a thing I hate doing. Not only do I not want to do it when I don’t want to do it, the result is always crap. Amethyst tells me it’s okay, or even good, but when a thing on my plate is not the thing I imagined being there I get all kinds of disappointed in myself.

April is also the month when I ran out of reefer. I hate that it’s 90 miles to the nearest recreational pot shop — the drive isn’t all that bad and the scenery is of course nice, but it costs about sixty bucks in fuel to push my old pickup truck there and back. If that new guy with several servers and a pile of programming needs comes on board I’m sure to spend some of his money on the evil weed.

Must be bedtime. Be well, friends and neighbors!


4 thoughts on “April Has Sucked

  1. Roadkill Spatula

    My Toyota has been getting 34 mpg consistently. I like that.

    Technology can suck. I had trouble calling my wife for several days (she’s in Colombia) from my phone. I could reach her Tigo phone via Skype (which is actually cheaper but not convenient), but never from my cell. Last night when we were Skyping, we looked in her phone menu and found that she had somehow blocked my number. This morning I was able to call her with no problem.

    1. happierheathen Post author

      My truck will do 16MPG at 65MPH on flat highway at half of this elevation, and better yet closer to sea level, but up here where the highways are all above 6000′ and never flat I get about 12MPG. On the up side, I’m not zipping along at highway speeds with my head at the same level as a mule deer’s rib cage. 🙂

      Wouldja believe that I’ve never used Skype?

  2. whyzat

    Wow, that pot ends up being expensive!
    I hate it when restaurants change things. A place in Austin had an Italian sub I loved. They changed it to an “Icktalian” sub and I never went back. The place is closed now. That’ll teach ’em to mess with my sub!
    I just grilled a pork tenderloin that I marinated in wine, oil, garlic and rosemary. Yum, and I’m going freeze some for a no-cook day.

    1. happierheathen Post author

      Yes, it surely does end up expensive, but still a cheaper habit than alcohol or tobacco. And with no liver damage, cancer, or hangover. 🙂

      Add a little black pepper and you’ve got my favorite pork t-loin marinade there. Sometimes I’ll throw in a little tarragon if I’m in the mood for it. Very tasty stuff!


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