Fucking Jerk Part Two

I just can’t believe this guy. This morning I’m pondering what my response ought to be…

I explained many things to Mister Dumb Fuck 22 months ago. Perhaps the most important of the things I explained is that I don’t work with cheapskates, time wasters, or assholes because there’s just no profit in it and the stress of dealing with them kills my productivity. It kills everyone’s productivity, really, but some people like to pretend otherwise — you can go only so long under social stress before the natural reaction to avoid or fight back kicks in. Second most important was the fact that the source of all of his longstanding frustration was his own decisions to work with different cut rate developers, which I went on to explain in detail. He assured me that (a) he was not a cheapskate, time waster, or asshole, and (b) he’d learned his lesson. The latter point, though, was clearly proven false when he shied away and contracted with cut rate developers who spent the next several months cashing his checks but producing nothing that worked and breaking things that worked before.

On the former point, I think it’s safe to say now that he is a cheapskate and an asshole. Sure, he’s frustrated because he’s gone two years without making the much needed progress that will make his several business ventures viable again, if indeed they ever were. I am not his wife, his bartender, or his shrink, so I don’t have three-fifths of a fuck to give about his emotional state. He’s entitled to his frustration, indeed he is, because he’s earned it. One cannot righteously blame the liquor for the hangover.

I’m a-thinkin’ that I might just accept his contract payment for March, then about a week after the check clears inform him that our business will be concluded on the 31st. If I do that I’ll provide the services for which he’ll have paid just as I would if I weren’t preparing to jettison the jerk, but I won’t take on any software projects. Or I might just not send the clown an invoice for March and tell him to go away. That’d be the shittier thing to do, I think, since it would leave him with just a bit more than a week to secure a replacement and make the transition. When it’s warranted I’m just as happy to be shitty. Another thing I’ve told the clown is that I am a nice guy but only as nice as I’m allowed to be.

Almost no one pays heed to fair warning. Not in my experience, anyway. I’m an open and honest guy, and in almost every case I give fair warning when a decision is made. If I’ve decided that I’m going to do a thing that will be received negatively if a person continues doing or not doing something, I tell that person so in the clearest possible terms. Then it’s up to him to decide for himself which outcome he’d prefer. If he would rather earn the unpleasant circumstances, so be it. I am not opposed to being karma’s hit man. I consider it an honor to be chosen. Also, driving the assholes out of your life means you don’t have to put up with them.

Because he mentioned that he might wish to terminate the month-to-month contract, I emailed him at the end of the day yesterday asking if there was any point to my sending along an invoice for March. His response was, “I am still evaluating for the next couple of weeks at least”. He just doesn’t get that I don’t play those kinds of games despite my having told him so several times. I don’t do power struggles. There will be no coercion. There will be no dominance and no submission. We will cooperate or we will part. The only question that remains to be answered is when and how we will part now that he’s made it clear that he will not be satisfied until I am made submissive.

At the moment I am indecisive. Do I boot the jerk on the 28th of February or the 31st of March? It’d be a bit shitty to leave him with just a week to react, but I’ve no strong aversion to being shitty to those who’ve worked hard to earn it.

 

 

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14 thoughts on “Fucking Jerk Part Two

  1. Tracy

    Our work scenarios have just enough in common for me to be nodding my head vigorously as I read through the last two posts. This morning I am dealing with a customer who installed the highest end versions of our software on VM’s, not just VM’s but shitty cloud VM’s from an overseas vendor with a bad reputation. We told them before they purchased our software, no VM’s we won’t support it, doesn’t work right. They did it anyway. We have tried to help as much as possible but it’s been horrible. Today they asked if they could just move all of their systems to our colo to run that way while they work up the budget to purchase servers, TODAY since their 50K customers are offline.
    I say, be firm but fair with your guy. Treat him like a professional even if he’s an ass..

    Reply
    1. happierheathen Post author

      I’ve just sent the clown an email message explaining that we’re done when February is done, but that in the meantime I’ll continue to provide the services he’s paid for. That’s as fair as I know how to be. I guess it was already evident that I have a very low tolerance for jerks. 😀

      Heh. 50k customers and running “in the cloud”? That’s some stunning brilliance right there. I’ve got several cloud servers under admin contract, but I dislike the idea of them as much as the reality — except when the VM host is Parallels, when I dislike the reality more. I do sometimes use VMware here in the office for development/QA because it’s cheaper than providing power to another server on the LAN, but I’d never put mission critical services on one.

      Reply
    1. happierheathen Post author

      Me too. Naught to do with jerks, that is. I don’t now about jerky people. I’ve seen beef, venison, turkey, bison, elk, even salmon jerky, but not jerky people. 🙂

      I just had to go there. Blame the burning flowers. 😀

      Reply
  2. sojournable

    Right, so, not quite sure how my above comment ended up on part 2. I was reading and commenting on part 1 at the time… the android app hung, I hit back… *whatver* just know that I have no idea as of yet what the last paragraph of part 2 says. About to read the who thing, in order, now.

    Reply
      1. sojournable

        I dislike not knowing which interface wordpress is going to give me every time I come here… android I get – only one kind. On the computer though… might be a popup, might be a full page. I don’t get that! WTH, they each have their quirks that trip me up. Annoying. grr, sorry

        In reference to “I am still evaluating for the next couple of weeks at least”, since there’s already a contract in place, I would probably assume he means to be billed. Whether or not you want to continue billing him is your decision though. 🙂

        Reply
        1. happierheathen Post author

          WordPress illustrates many of the things that annoy me about “PHP koderz”. I guess there’s no point to enumerating that list. 🙂

          It’s a month-to-month contract so every month end is a potential exit point, and with this client demonstrating an amalgam of troubling behaviors exiting is the only wise choice. I fully expected that it would come to this, but the end came sooner than I expected. Most clients of this sort will at least wait until their most pressing needs are met before they crank up the stink-o-meter, but this guy behaved as though he was accustomed to dealing with starving basement dwellers and started turning the knob as soon as he’d decided to write but hadn’t yet written the first check.

          Reply

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