Erection Follerup

The votes have been cast and counted. About half of the registered voters in the county turned out.

The measure to increase state income taxes to support education, which will raise about a billion dollars a year for public primary education, passed 65.4% to 34.5%. In my county, though, it was 15.5% for to 83.6% against (with the balance abstaining). As I said, the measure would be decided by the Front Range and Dinkytown is fucking ignorant and wishes very much to stay that way. I wonder how our local politricksters would feel if the state were to say to them that we don’t get any of the new education funding because we so clearly do not want it, having voted so overwhelmingly against it.

They’d bitch long and loud, for sure. Our local dollars are supposed to go to local works and not to the Front Range, but Front Range money is supposed to come here. It ain’t evil socialism if it benefits me directly.

The measure to increase county property taxes to support local public primary education was defeated, 70% to 30%. The irony: Dinkytown’s recently built a new elementary school, now in its second year of operation. It’s a shoddily constructed piece of shit that will probably go tumbledown in 20 years or less, and almost went tumbledown before it was even occupied, but it’s all modrun lookin’. We could fund the construction of the building but we want nothing to do with the education that should take place inside of it. Everyone agrees, though for widely varying reasons, that public primary education sucks today like never before, but they seem to believe that the answer is to leave the schools with a perpetually shrinking budget — as if you can improve the health of a thing by starving it to death.

The measure to increase the marijuana tax passed 65% to 34.9% at the state level, and 57% to 40.2% with the remainder abstaining at the county level. Dinkytown’s always opposed to new taxes that aren’t for a pet project of a locally powerful player, but there’s a will to punish the evil pot smokers. Dinkytown will not permit retail marijuana anyway, so any filthy dirty hippie pinko commie socialist America hating terrorist lover who wants to partake of a harmless plant will have to grow his own or acquire it somewhere outside of town. I’ll probably end up growing my own, both to ensure that I know precisely what I’m getting and also because it’s much cheaper, and tax-free too. If I do, I’ll probably end up giving away more than I use because I’m just that kind of guy. (I’ve got two quarts of homemade hot sauce fermenting away right now to give away. It’s good karma to change the bees you want to see in the world.)

Also, though not a local issue, the eleven Colorado counties overrun by ignorant loonies who wish to create the 51st state of Northern Colorado because they believe Denver is out of touch with their rural needs saw their measures passed in all eleven counties. A pointless gesture at best, since the US Congress is never even going to consider carving up the state into pieces. What the fuck, ignorant loonies, if you want the rest of the nation to perceive you as the ignorant loonies you are you’ve managed that quite handily. But if all you really wanted to accomplish was to “have your voices heard” it would have been cheaper and easier to just keep posting your ignorant lunatic rants on Facebook. (I’m amazed that our county wasn’t one of the eleven.)

On the up side, those four cities (all on the Front Range) that had fracking bans on their ballots all saw those measures passed. If the same thing were to make it to the Dinkytown ballot, it would be defeated 80:20, for sure. We loves us some fracking in these parts. What good is tap water if it won’t run in an internal combustion engine anyway? Hydrogen sulfide and benzene are good for ya!

So, why was it, again, that I was supposed to do my civic duty and in all sobriety push buttons on the electronic voting machines yesterday?

Something interesting that’s not related to yesterday’s erection being held: That big storm that blew through last month and downed tons of limbs and even whole trees left our town council saying that we’re all on our own because the town can’t afford to help out with cleanup. One of the council members had as his reasoning, expressed privately after the council meeting, “I had to clean up and haul away all of my own shit, so the rest of you can, too”. He doesn’t live in town anyway, but that’s beside the point. That decision was made after everyone had their yards cleaned up and their debris all nicely stacked beside the street. The norm is for the town to go around cleaning up such debris periodically anyway, so people have come to expect it. It’s one of the things we pay taxes for. We all even know the rules: Nothing more than three inches in diameter, stacked perpendicular to the street with the thick ends facing the street so it’s easy to handle. The best the town could manage this time was to promote the services of tree service companies whose crews came from outside the county to do the same job at homeowner expense. The town is unloading every responsibility they can possibly get away with transferring to someone else, and just neglecting others, then voting to reduce taxes paid to the entities they’ve unloaded those responsibilities onto. Where the hell do they expect this to lead?

We got all of our debris stacked and stationed just like everyone else, and when the town council decided to be assholes about it I figured I’d get to it in my own time, and until then it would serve as a visible protest. My plan was to get after it next weekend, and cut it all up for burning on summer evenings next summer. Though the county landfill would take it all for free, it’s more than 20 miles to the landfill and it would be six or eight loads in my pickup, or three or four if I rented a trailer. That’s a lot of fuel to burn in the old gas guzzler. It’d be cheaper and more fun to get Amethyst drunk on wine and see if she’d dance naked around the fires we could make with it.

I don’t know how it came about, yet, but my guess is that the county commissioners met and decided that the town is all fucked up. Starting Monday I noticed county equipment around, hauling downed limbs. Hmm. Interesting. Just a moment ago I noticed that our pile of limbs was half gone, and the other half is now in the street. Apparently the county is doing me a favor. That’s awfully nice of them. I’m glad now that I hadn’t gotten around to it yet, and much more so to know that the county commissioners aren’t quite so bat shit crazy as the town council.

I’m all politicked out now, must rest up for next year. Be well friends and neighbors!


7 thoughts on “Erection Follerup

  1. Roadkill Spatula

    Dinkytown and the liberal parts of Colorado are both reflections of our nation’s approach to its crippling debt: cut services (just the ones we don’t think we care about) or raise taxes (just enough to cover a tiny portion of the massive services and bureaucracy without really making a dent in the deficit).


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