I just loves me some tender young cactus. Not quite to the point of can’t get enough, but I can only go just so long without some nopalitos in my diet before I just can’t stand it any more. This morning I scrambled some nopalitos and sliced jalapenos with some of those very nice ranch eggs, laid on a generous splash of my homemade chile sauce, and wrapped it all up in a tortilla. I don’t know about champions, having never been one, but it seemed the breakfast of someone who’s ready to take on the day or at least the next few hours of it.
Some folks came around last night looking for donations of canned good and non-perishables for the food bank. A worthy cause, I think. The problem is that we just don’t do canned goods. We scrounged around and delivered up all of the cans we had, which amounted to one each of sliced pears, bamboo shoots, and tomato sauce. I wish it could have been more, much more, but we’re not canned goods people and having given away what we had we’re now a can-free household. I wonder if there’s such a thing as a good canned corned beef hash, because I think that if I were poor and dragging bottom I’d think corned beef hash a damned fine thing to have on hand. Is there such a thing as good canned corned beef? If so, I might just go buy a bunch of it to donate.
I’d imagine that I must have had canned corned beef hash at some point, probably that disappointing goo delivered to the hapless patrons of diners. I wouldn’t wish that on anyone. It kinda sucks to get all revved up for corned beef hash only to be served some food-like substance that the dog wouldn’t eat. I kinda figure that that’s why dogs sometimes lick their own asses, to get rid of the taste of something they had to eat only because it was all that was offered. But if there’s such a thing as good canned corned beef hash I think I’ll round up a bunch of it to donate. If there’s not, then I guess I’ll have to think up something else.
Unlike my more conservative friends and neighbors, I think we need more welfare for the poor. It’d be easy to do if we quit giving it to the rich. Cranking the minimum wage up would help a lot, too — going to ten bucks an hour, which isn’t really as big an increase as it ought to be, would add less than a quarter (of a dollar) to the bill for a McDonald’s meal according to the folks who figure that kind of thing out. It extrapolating that proportionally is valid, which I have no way of knowing, then going to $13/hour for those minimum wage folks would make the average McDonald’s meal, what, four bits more? It seems a positive investment, and one that would get a lot of those folks who work for Kroc’s Crock off of the food stamps and other assistance. By golly, that would be reducing the welfare rolls, wouldn’it? Kinda hard to be opposed to that.
But in the meantime, since I ain’t the king of the world and all of my ideas are goofball, I guess I’ll worry about whether or not the canned corned beef is worth a damn so I know whether or not to donate a bunch of it. And if it ain’t worth a damn, I’ll worry about what is worth a damn and upon discovering what it is donate a bunch of that.
So, dear, gentle readers: What comes out of a can that is worth a damn?