Going Nowhere Is Good

Cruisin’ and perusin’ this here Voidpress contraption has left me to conclude that I am one of the few hereabouts who isn’t in some kind of transitional phase of life. Lots of folks we know in the tangible world are in transition, too. Amethyst and I are kinda sorta in a long, slow transition from what was (very ugly) and what’s to come (quite nice), but where we are isn’t all that bad and it doesn’t feel at all transitional. Once she’s off of the unheathenly early morning shift we’ll be without a thing to complain about except being unable to contribute to any entertaining bitchfests. Since I got through the run of client crises that were mine because people pay me to have their headaches for them I’ve been feeling downright content and accomplished, and with the work just coming in and moving out as it should I get some sense of accomplishment almost every day to keep the contentment topped up.

Having nothing to bitch about decreases blogging frequency and volume, but that just doesn’t seem a thing to bitch about. The more I have to say, the less I’m loving life at the moment, so the less I have to say the better I like it. This post is an exercise in expressing the mundane in as many words as possible in the hope that with practice I might become more adept at… well, expressing the mundane using as many words as possible.

I now have positive proof that a picture is not necessarily worth a thousand words:

arkon_mount_htc_one_m8That picture says exactly 25 words: I am fond of my new cell phone mount and really do need to clean both my camera lens and the floor of my truck. I suppose it could also say that I’ve given up on trying to convince Amethyst to stop crossing her legs and getting the dirt from her shoes on my door and glovebox, but that still doesn’t take it anywhere near a thousand words. It might also say that I haven’t got around to washing the truck since driving in the rain, but we’re still far short of a thousand words.

It used to seem important to upgrade that stereo to the better factory model with a CD player in it, but the CD era is drawing to a close anyway. Why fool around with optical media when you can wirelessly stream your music?

It seems a good time to leave that topic. I’m boring even myself with it.

I love my job. It’s not every guy like me who gets to bill doctors and lawyers for professional services. I love that part. I just sent a surgeon an invoice. Is that fucking cool, or what? I know that lots of people sell stuff to surgeons, but it’s still a novel idea to me.

Oh damn. I lost my train of thought.

Happy Solstice!

I wonder why I never get around to blogging holiday wishes until after most of my regular readers are asleep and the holiday is over. On the other hand, what the hell is wrong with you people anyway? I’m still going strong at midnight.

‘Twas three years ago today that Miss Autumn came to live with us and became my new master.


That photo was snapped just a moment before the last, similar one, before she was fully annoyed with me for futzing about with the phone rather than loving on The Cat.

I joined Amethyst for her annual Autumnal Equinox ritual, which thankfully is a short and simple one. She’s not so big on elaborate ceremonies. Hell, our wedding ceremony didn’t last five minutes. We know what’s important: The reception lasted four days.

In other news, the cool new (car) cell phone mount that I ordered last week arrived today. It’s the first one I’ve seen that I’ve actually liked — its predecessors were selected based upon how they rated in suck factor, but none went past zero into non-suck territory. This one’s a flexible gooseneck that bolts to the seat mount, and not so easily flexed that it’s going to wander around with my relatively large phone on it. It’s not going to fall off of the windshield on hot days, or cold days, or any days at all. And the gooseneck is long enough at 22″ to put the phone in a great location where I can reach it to poke the car mode buttons and easily glance at it to see what I need to see on the GPS. So yay.

I was also supposed to receive my bluetooth car kit today, but the fleabay seller fucked up. Or fleabay did. Either way, when I ordered it I got punched in the face with an alert dialog telling me that the seller doesn’t ship to PO boxes, so I changed the shipping address to our home address. Then the thing was shipped via USPS — and there’s no mail delivery to our home or to any homes in our neighborhood, so the package got to ride all around this end of the county and then go back to the postal orifice. Fortunately it’s Dinkytown, and we’re known to the folks who inhabit the postal orifice (and especially so because Amethyst worked there), so the package isn’t going all the way back to California just to get one line of the address changed.


Later this week, the old truck will become bluetooth enabled and then we’ll be uptown. I’m not going to pretend that I have anything in common with the cool kids, though.

Since none of this shit is interesting despite being the best I’ve got at the moment, I’ll get out of the way and let you find something worth paying attention to, if there is such a thing still in existence these days.

Be well, friends and neighbors!

I hate it when explanations about ugly things that have (or might not have) happened are too incongruent to be taken at face value. This living among humans thing is far more bother than it’s worth.

Stuff. None Worth Reading.

Aaarrrgggh. I aaarrggh stuffed. Amethyst spotted some enormous white mushrooms at the market yesterday so I grabbed eight of them, and every one the diameter of my open palm. Shrooms that large just scream “stuff me!”. Oh, the places I could go with that line, but I won’t. I’m saving that for something else. I stuffed the shrooms with crab and wild rice, with some scallions, herbs, a dash of dry white wine, with mucho butter along for the ride, and topped them with a blend of mozzarella, parmesan, and jack cheeses. It’s heresy, I know, to fling jack in there, but I wanted to tone down the flavor a bit so the other ingredients could shine through. It worked, so I’m happy. A mite overfull, but happy anyway.

I visited a ski town today, which might have a little something to do with the happiness level. There’s something about a brand new half ounce that makes one smile.

The other thing I was saving up my supply of bad words for: You’ve got to kiss a lot of vaginas to find one that’s not a cunt. That might be an original saying. Or it might not. It might get me bruised, bloodied, and broken. Unless I can hide better than pissed off women can seek. :D

Amethyst stuck a song in my head this morning… I replaced it several hours later with another:

That is all.

Wholly Cow, I’m Cot Up

It finally happened: I’m no longer behind in my work. It took longer than I’d expected, but I’d failed to anticipate all of the things that got all blowed the fuck up getting all blowed the fuck up. Anyone got a reliably working crystal ball to donate to an unworthy cause such as this freaky old heathen? :D

Today I shipped out a new server to one client and a drive full of archive data to another, worked up a prototype application for a new client, cleared a few more trivial things from the to-stress-over list, and also fed the cat. It’s much nicer in the office without that server being in the way, and the next time power is applied to it neither the noise nor the heat will be mine to endure. Yay!

The best part of getting that server out the door is that soon we’ll be retiring a couple of old virtual (“cloud”) servers that haven’t been updated in so long that they cannot be automatically updated any more. With the interwebz being so hostile as they are I will have less to worry about when those outdated systems are vaporized and so NMP any more.

The new client is almost an interesting story. Something possessed the guy to go looking for developers in the middle of the night on Saturday night, just shy of midnight here in the good time zone, just shy of 2AM in New York City where he lives and works. I received the email from the contact form processor on my web site, and my first thought was to blow it off until Monday. I can’t really be a properly maladjusted, malcontent, misfit, pot-headed loser dweeb if I have ambition beyond packing the next bowl, right? The only correct response was to blow it off until Monday, but instead I replied via email to the guy and we had a nice little protracted conversation, then last (Sunday) night I called him to discuss his project. During the course of what was a very pleasant conversation he told me that he’d contacted four other developers and I was the only one who’d responded, and now that we’d both invested time into the preliminaries those other four are out of luck.

Score one more, albeit a small one, for the maladjusted, malcontent, misfit, pot-headed loser dweeb. :D

I’ve A Bossier Boss

I guess that now I know who’s The Boss:


Miss Awesome says it’s her office now, and now that I’ve been demoted I’d better hop right to it and get that pile of notes on my desk cleaned up. Not that she’s tyrannical or anything. She lets me drink liquor and smoke pot at my desk and I can take breaks whenever I want them, so I guess I can tolerate doing what I’m going to do anyway because clutter makes me crazier.

Until today I’d never bid in an eBay auction — I’ve just never wanted to accept the risk that a thing I could buy immediately at an acceptable price might be gone by the time the auction I might not win ended. But today the ethernet switch that hooks up most of my office network punked out for the second time so I thought I might give it a try. I scored a nice, brand new, Netgear 48 port modular rackmount switch for twenty bucks, $35 by the time shipping is added. Not bad, not bad at all. And it comes with an extra gigabit ethernet module already installed — MSRP for the module alone is $130 so I guess I did okay. :D

It’s important to have lots of spare ethernet ports in the office now that Miss Autumn is the boss. She’s much bigger on toys than I am.

Seven Buzzards


Where’s Waldo? If you look carefully there are seven buzzards in the above photo, five in the trees in addition to the two obvious birds on the wing. Some are hard to see even in the full size image to which the one above is linked. So I guess it would only be right to say that there are two in the tree in the left side of the frame, one pretending to be a tree topper and another at about his 8 o’clock and partially concealed by a branch; another is near the top of the tree closest to the middle of the frame; two more are in the tree to the right of that one (not that to the far right and in the foreground), one above the other.

I’m a programmer, Jim, not a photographer!

The thing that’s interesting to me is that on the lawn beneath those trees there’s an event taking place with lots of people and live music. Who knew turkey vultures like live music? It’s not at all unusual to see buzzards around, in fact it would be unusual this time of year to not see them, and they often fly low over town hoping to spot a meal. Sometimes one or two will light in a tall tree, but I’ve not seen them light so close to so many people making so much noise. Maybe they’re just all feeling fat and sassy after dining on the early crop of roadkill so have more time to spend on entertainment and storing energy for the upcoming migration.